Blog: Entry for February 17, 2010

My son is playing quietly in his room. He has eaten breakfast, I’ve changed his diaper and I will change it again before his nap in a few minutes. I’ve given him his antibiotics, and I’m basically done with all the things he needs done before his nap. My list is almost checked off for the morning.

I have found that getting into a┬ároutine is critical for getting things done. It’s nearly impossible to get anything accomplished without one. The hard part is not creating the routine, it’s sticking to it that’s often difficult.

He is going to the doctor today about his chest. For those of you who don’t know, he has a fusion on his chest that connects his bone tissues, to the muscle tissues. This will require surgery to correct. I am not too excited about this. In fact, I’m very nervous. My little baby is going to be put under while a surgeon cuts open his chest and removes tissues from it. And all I will be able to do is pace a cold waiting room waiting on them to tell me he’s fine.

It’s a feeling of complete lack of control, and a strong desire to help my son when I know he will be hurt, and I can’t. That’s one thing that brings a ┬ámother to tears, is not being able to soothe their child. My flesh and blood.

However, today is not the surgery date, it is simply an office visit to check on the culture his doctor sent in to find an antibiotic to help clear up the infection for the surgery. With the infection present they cannot operate.

Right now the issue at hand is laundry. Then I’m going to read some of the book my boyfriend gave me for Valentine’s Day, and then lunch somewhere in all this. Busy, busy day. But I like it, all in all it’s worth it.


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